Losing your Mama is enough to try to deal with baby girl. That kind of hurt is nigh on impossible to deal with rationally for a while. You need a bit of time, instead you find out Jeff's a walking sperm donor the night you bury your Mother. That just ratchets it up to the... "can't take in what anyone is saying" I think I'm going to lose my mind, "please excuse me I'm getting a migraine and I need to lay down." Oh my Good Lord what is happening?....kind of time, and it really is unbelievable that the worm could go to his girlfriend on the night you buried your Mother. The very least he could have done was to have the good grace to be with you then, but he was too little of a man to do that. Honey, Kellie was right, he did you a favor, you may not know it yet...and I'm writing in September. Lord knows I hope you have some peace by now darlin, but he did you a favor by doing it BEFORE you were married. At LEAST you don't have to go through a divorce with the worm, who knows you might have ended up paying him monies simply to be rid of him! Thankfully there are no children that bind you two together (for a lifetime), so you are rid of the piece of excrement. Just get rid of all the pictures and get rid of all the other things scattered about that remind you of him.
He wasn't strong enough to be the man for you. You need someone who has a personality that is as strong as yours. Jeff was like some old hound dog, every time you said something, he would roll over and show his belly and thump his tail, waiting and waiting to get his tummy rubbed. You need a man, not a weak little dormouse, and he was a dormouse, sugar! He was too scared of you to say what he wanted to say, that's why he went and found a girlfriend. He had to screw things up, because he was too scared to stand up to you. Such a sad, sad shame, because of such a weak little man! All he had to do was open his mouth and talk, one would think as an attorney he would be good at that (I sure wouldn't hire him, he evidently can't talk his way out of a paper bag, so the last thing I would want is a mute attorney!HA!) but ol Jeff didn't have the cohones to talk it thruough, and that's his occupation.
Sweetheart, you will find a MAN, not a dormouse. Just wait and see, and Jeff will be an excellent learning experience. You see sweetheart, you really do have to learn the art of COMPROMISE. It takes 2 in a relationship, not just what You want, just because that's the way you've always had it. Not everyone can afford to start out the way You want it...you walk before you run, as the saying goes. You had your faults, he had his, then he had the GrandDaddy of all faults, he took everything and tore it to shreds. There's just no coming back from breaking the trust in the relationship, especially at a time like you were in, when you were the most vulnerable, as Jeff did...unlike with you, you were just being a spoiled "little girl" that needs to grow up, actually one that's never been told NO for all the right reasons and/or had someone actually call you on all the ways you have of getting everything your way!
However, I think you've just grown up, whether you wanted to or not. Bless your heart sweet girl... I'm so sorry about your Mama, and I'm sorry that Jeff was worthless whale dung, but I hope you have realized that you dodged a huge bullet by finding out now rather than later.
I hope you are finding peace in Him, that's the only way to get your head around losing your Mama. I speak from experience. It's been 9 years and I miss her so much still, but I can think about her and talk about her without crying now. Which I never thought I would be able to do...She was my best friend and when she died I was so lost. Keep Him front and center, and read your Bible, you will find so much comfort there. Of course, the chances of you reading this and me smoking crack are about one and the same. Never. Don't know why I felt compelled to write this, I've never done this kind of thing before, I guess it was seeing the hurt from you losing your Mama, and as one southern woman to another that touched me. So this Georgia peach from north of Atlanta (and NOTHING like the "real housewives of atlanta" ha! I have NEVER seen that kind of housewife in Atlanta, most of those women aren't even MARRIED! What charity work do they do? Junior Service League? I haven't seen them take one dinner to anyone, oh don't even get me started. They are SUCH an embarrassment!) However, as a born and bred REAL Georgia woman and wife of 25 years, I just felt for you sweetie, like I said I know how hard it was when I lost my Mother and you are younger than I was. I can't imagine how you feel, I felt cheated and I was 39. Truly place your trust in Him, He will be what gets you through this, along with your friends and other loved ones. God Bless you baby girl.
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Losing your Mama is enough to try to deal with baby girl. That kind of hurt is nigh on impossible to deal with rationally for a while. You need a bit of time, instead you find out Jeff's a walking sperm donor the night you bury your Mother. That just ratchets it up to the... "can't take in what anyone is saying" I think I'm going to lose my mind, "please excuse me I'm getting a migraine and I need to lay down." Oh my Good Lord what is happening?....kind of time, and it really is unbelievable that the worm could go to his girlfriend on the night you buried your Mother. The very least he could have done was to have the good grace to be with you then, but he was too little of a man to do that. Honey, Kellie was right, he did you a favor, you may not know it yet...and I'm writing in September. Lord knows I hope you have some peace by now darlin, but he did you a favor by doing it BEFORE you were married. At LEAST you don't have to go through a divorce with the worm, who knows you might have ended up paying him monies simply to be rid of him! Thankfully there are no children that bind you two together (for a lifetime), so you are rid of the piece of excrement. Just get rid of all the pictures and get rid of all the other things scattered about that remind you of him.
He wasn't strong enough to be the man for you. You need someone who has a personality that is as strong as yours. Jeff was like some old hound dog, every time you said something, he would roll over and show his belly and thump his tail, waiting and waiting to get his tummy rubbed. You need a man, not a weak little dormouse, and he was a dormouse, sugar! He was too scared of you to say what he wanted to say, that's why he went and found a girlfriend. He had to screw things up, because he was too scared to stand up to you. Such a sad, sad shame, because of such a weak little man! All he had to do was open his mouth and talk, one would think as an attorney he would be good at that (I sure wouldn't hire him, he evidently can't talk his way out of a paper bag, so the last thing I would want is a mute attorney!HA!) but ol Jeff didn't have the cohones to talk it thruough, and that's his occupation.
Sweetheart, you will find a MAN, not a dormouse. Just wait and see, and Jeff will be an excellent learning experience. You see sweetheart, you really do have to learn the art of COMPROMISE. It takes 2 in a relationship, not just what You want, just because that's the way you've always had it. Not everyone can afford to start out the way You want it...you walk before you run, as the saying goes. You had your faults, he had his, then he had the GrandDaddy of all faults, he took everything and tore it to shreds. There's just no coming back from breaking the trust in the relationship, especially at a time like you were in, when you were the most vulnerable, as Jeff did...unlike with you, you were just being a spoiled "little girl" that needs to grow up, actually one that's never been told NO for all the right reasons and/or had someone actually call you on all the ways you have of getting everything your way!
However, I think you've just grown up, whether you wanted to or not. Bless your heart sweet girl... I'm so sorry about your Mama, and I'm sorry that Jeff was worthless whale dung, but I hope you have realized that you dodged a huge bullet by finding out now rather than later.
I hope you are finding peace in Him, that's the only way to get your head around losing your Mama. I speak from experience. It's been 9 years and I miss her so much still, but I can think about her and talk about her without crying now. Which I never thought I would be able to do...She was my best friend and when she died I was so lost. Keep Him front and center, and read your Bible, you will find so much comfort there. Of course, the chances of you reading this and me smoking crack are about one and the same. Never. Don't know why I felt compelled to write this, I've never done this kind of thing before, I guess it was seeing the hurt from you losing your Mama, and as one southern woman to another that touched me. So this Georgia peach from north of Atlanta (and NOTHING like the "real housewives of atlanta" ha! I have NEVER seen that kind of housewife in Atlanta, most of those women aren't even MARRIED! What charity work do they do? Junior Service League? I haven't seen them take one dinner to anyone, oh don't even get me started. They are SUCH an embarrassment!) However, as a born and bred REAL Georgia woman and wife of 25 years, I just felt for you sweetie, like I said I know how hard it was when I lost my Mother and you are younger than I was. I can't imagine how you feel, I felt cheated and I was 39. Truly place your trust in Him, He will be what gets you through this, along with your friends and other loved ones. God Bless you baby girl.