21. Make large amounts of cash working just a few hours a week.

22. Learn to accidentally kill a man with your bare hands.

23. Listen to a psychic when she grabs your hands, goes into a trance, and gives you a dire warning. The woman knows what she's talking about.

24. Don't be afraid to cry.

25. If someone you've always known, but never talked to a lot, starts interacting with you more, they are probably going to reveal a really big secret to you. And then die.

26. Be willing to risk it all for love.

27. Don't sleep with your ex-wife the night before your wedding. She WILL get pregnant, no matter how much protection you use.

28. Don't grow a mustache.

29. Don't move to Wisteria Lane. Not even for the free baked goods.

30. No matter how cute the new girl in town seems to be, she has a hidden past.

31. Good hair is more important than a solid resume.